‘He must have been born offside’: Ferguson’s best Man Utd quotes

12:18 04/12/2013
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  • As Sir Alex Ferguson’s glorious reign at Manchester United comes to an end, the legendary manager will be remembered almost as much for his quips, rhetoric and turn of phrase as he will for the unparalleled success he delivered at Old Trafford.

    With that in mind, Sport360 has compiled our 20 favourite Ferguson lines to relive. So in no particular order:

    On his mission at Manchester United: “My greatest challenge is not what’s happening at the moment, my greatest challenge was knocking Liverpool right off their f*****g perch. And you can print that.”

    On Gary Neville’s defensive skills: “If he was an inch taller he’d be the best centre-half in Britain. His father is 6ft 2in – I’d check the milkman.”

    On the 2003 title race: “It’s getting tickly now – squeaky-bum time, I call it.”

    On AC Milan striker Filippo Inzaghi: “That lad must have been born offside.”

    On Paul Ince: “I used to have a saying that when a player is at his peak, he feels as though he can climb Everest in his slippers. That’s what he was like.”

    On José Mourinho: “He was certainly full of it, calling me boss and big man when we had our post-match drink after the first leg. But it would help if his greetings were accompanied by a decent glass of wine. What he gave me was paint-stripper.”

    On selling Cristiano Ronaldo to Real Madrid: “Do you think I would enter into a contract with that mob? Absolutely no chance. I would not sell them a virus.”

    On Arsène Wenger: “They say he’s an intelligent man, right? Speaks five languages. I’ve got a 15-year-old boy from the Ivory Coast who speaks five languages!”

    On Italians: “When an Italian tells me it’s pasta on the plate I check under the sauce to make sure. They are the inventors of the smokescreen.”

    On Ryan Giggs as a youngster: “I remember the first time I saw him. He was 13 and just floated over the ground like a cocker spaniel chasing a piece of silver paper in the wind.”

    On if he felt Liverpool would win the 2007 Premier League title: “You must be joking. Do I look as if I’m a masochist ready to cut myself? How does relegation sound instead?”

    On Wayne Rooney’s transfer request in 2010: “Sometimes you look in a field and you see a cow and you think it’s a better cow than the one you’ve got in your own field. It’s a fact. Right? And it never really works out that way.”

    On Manchester City (pt 1): “Sometimes you have a noisy neighbour. You cannot do anything about that. They will always be noisy. You just have to get on with your life, put your television on and turn it up a bit louder.”

    On Manchester City (pt 2): “It’s City, isn’t it? They are a small club, with a small mentality. All they can talk about is Manchester United, that’s all they’ve done and they can’t get away from it.”

    On winning the 1999 Champions League: “I can’t believe it. I can’t believe it. Football. Bloody hell.”

    On former players becoming managers: “It can be difficult to pinpoint who would make it as a manager. For instance, nobody here thought Mark Hughes would become a manager, never in a million years, and we all thought Bryan Robson was a certainty to be a top manager.”

    On winning a 19th league title: “It’s not so much passing Liverpool. It’s more important that United are the best team in the country in terms of winning titles.”

    And on winning a 20th: “Look at me – it’s taken 10 years off me today. It’s these tablets, they’re great!”

    On the incident when he kicked a boot into David Beckham’s face: “It was a freakish incident. If I tried it 100 or a million times it couldn’t happen again. If I could I would have carried on playing!”

    On his showdown with Newcastle manager Alan Pardew: “The press have had a field day. The only person they have not spoken to is Barack Obama because he is busy.”


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