After Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho's latest rant about Rafa Benitez's waistline, Sport360 picks out his top twenty quotes over the years.
“And for her also to think about me and to speak about me, I think she needs to occupy her time, and if she takes care of her husband’s diet she will have less time to speak about me” Jose on Rafa Benitez's wife.
"If I wanted to have an easy job, working with the big protection of what I have already done before, I would have stayed at Porto – beautiful blue chair, the UEFA Champions League trophy, God, and after God, me." On taking a new challenge at Chelsea.
"Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a special one.” Announcing his arrival in typical Jose style at Chelsea.
"I think he is one of these people who is a voyeur. He likes to watch other people. There are some guys who, when they are at home, have a big telescope to see what happens in other families. He speaks, speaks, speaks about Chelsea." On Wenger.
“We are on top at the moment but not because of the club’s financial power. We are in contention for a lot of trophies because of my hard work.” Jose dismisses claims that they win because of the bankroll at Chelsea.
“If Roman Abramovich helped me out in training we would be bottom of the league and if I had to work in his world of big business, we would be bankrupt!” Putting to bed any doubt that Roman Abramovich has a say in picking the team.
"It's not even a game between me and him. It's a game where a kid made some statements not showing maturity and respect. Maybe [it's his] education, difficult childhood, no education, maybe [it is] the consequence of that." Cristiano Ronaldo may now be his golden boy, but the two Portuguese didn’t always see eye to eye.
"Ronaldo is a good player but he is certainly not the best. He deserved the Golden Ball award because his team won the Champions League and the Premier League. But, for me, Ibrahimovic is the best." Tarring Ronnie with an mercurial-but-lazy-Swede-shaped brush.
"The style of how we play is very important. But it is omelettes and eggs. No eggs – no omelettes! It depends on the quality of the eggs. In the supermarket you have class one, two or class three eggs and some are more expensive than others and some give you better omelettes. So when the class one eggs are in Waitrose and you cannot go there, you have a problem." On the frustration of the tightening of the transfer market purse-strings in the final months of his Chelsea stint.
"You can't win the treble every season. But I've done it twice and I think twice is quite a lot." Modesty, Jose-style.
"It was no coincidence that he showed the red card to Sneijder. I have realised that they are not going to allow us to wrap this title up. But we were perfect. We would have won this game even with seven men. Maybe with six we would have struggled, but we would have won with seven." Mourinho after Wesley Sneijder had been sent off in the 2-0 derby win over AC Milan in January 2010.
“It is like having a blanket that is too small for the bed. You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But I am content because the blanket is cashmere. It is no ordinary blanket.” During a post-transfer window Chelsea injury crisis.
“Young players are a little bit like melons. Only when you open and taste the melon are you 100 per cent sure that the melon is good. Sometimes you have beautiful melons but they don’t taste very good and some other melons are a bit ugly and when you open them, the taste is fantastic!” On, er, melons.
"Who were (Frank) Lampard, (John) Terry and (Didier) Drogba two years ago? They were certainly not world stars. And in this moment who are they?” On moulding superstars.
"Ricardo Carvalho seems to have problems understanding things, maybe he should have an IQ test, or go to a mental hospital or something” After Carvalho blasted Mourinho for not picking him to play.
“Why drive Aston Martin all the time, when i have Ferrari and Porsche as well? That would just be stupid” – When asked about rotating Joe Cole, Arjen Robben and Damien Duff.
“Barcelona have a great club. But in 200 years of history they have won the European Cup only once. I have been managing for a few years and I have already won the same amount.” – said during the 2005-2006 season. Barcelona went on to win the Champions League.
“Barcelona is a cultural city with many great theatres and this boy [Lionel Messi] has learned very well. He’s learned play-acting.” After Asier Del Horno was sent off in Chelsea's defeat against Barcelona in February 2006.
"He is a wonderful, great manager. I have a lot of respect for the big man. I call him ‘boss’ because he’s our [the other managers'] boss. He’s the top man, a really nice person and he deserves to be the boss. Maybe when I am 60 the kids will call me the same.” On Sir Alex Ferguson.
"I would rather play with 10 men than wait for a player who is late for the bus." Mourinho leaves his Real Madrid players in no doubt about who is boss.
Know more about Sport360 Application